The big 40

Yes, in 8 months I will be 40. I never envisioned this day would ever come, mostly because I’ve been telling people I was 27 for the past ten years. I guess with it around the corner I’ve started to take stock of myself. You know the questions you ask yourself late at night when the house is quite and you just can’t seem to turn off your brain: “Am I a success?” “Do I look as good as I did in my twenties?” “Is this the year I actually become old?” I don’t want to get old!

I’m sure some of you reading are thinking these are totally irrational thoughts and yes they probably are but they are still my thoughts.

Anyway, January is just around the corner and my new years resolution is  to invest a few more precious moments a day on me. This is something that is very hard for me because now that I’m back at work I want to spend the hours I am home blessing my family but after two plus years of doing this I’m realizing that avoiding myself to serve the people I love is not working out all that fantastic. Not to the degree I do it anyway.

It’s time for a plan. Time to rethink things. Time to stick to it and ask for help when I need it. I’ve actually been doing a test run with the kids and hubby for the last couple of weeks (they are happily unaware so Shhh!) and no one has starved or been inconvenienced too much. Although in my trying to be mom of the year my son eat raw meat the other day. Ay ay ay!

Our life is busy but if I don’t figure a way to balance it all I’ll be a hot mess any minute now. So that’s what 40 will be for me. Figuring out all our stuff. Wish me luck!

me at 17

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Me at 39 and a 1/2

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Like my husband often reminds my kids “when momma is happy, everyone is happy.”

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