Not enough and that’s ok

Our lives are very busy; with a senior in high school struggling to make a path that will lead her to adult hood, a new teenager working to fit in at school and find his place in our home, and a husband back in school expanding his spiritual knowledge. I work hard to be useful and a blessing to each of them.

With my own commitments to work, church, getting my foot and ankle stronger, house work etc. there are days when I don’t feel like I’m enough.

Was I patient enough with correction?

Were my words of encouragement enough for guidance and direction?

Did I focus too much on my own commitments that I didn’t see the important need in front of me with my neighbor?

Was dinner taken out of the freezer before I left for work?

As a mother I’m called to be a nurturer. I am the cheerleader, the encourager, the one who holds the mirror up and reminds you that “You can do it! You are the child of a King”. There are days when not only do I feel like I’m not enough but I know that I’m not enough.

But I’m not alone. . .

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A few years ago I read about a Greek saint named Phanourious. He is the Saint who assist the faithful in revealing lost or hidden spiritual matters of the heart, objects, directing or revealing actions that should be taken and similar situations. You can read about his martyrdom here.

On my way out to work a few weeks ago Vincent couldn’t find something he needed for soccer. Soccer was directly after school and he needed to leave the house that morning with the item. I could see him becoming stressed that he still hadn’t had breakfast and wasn’t dressed for school. I had just a few minutes before I had to rush out the door so I began to help him search. I double checked everywhere in the house he had just looked and no luck. I stopped and I asked Vincent if he knew there was a St. who helps you find lost things. He said no. I told him to pray and ask St. Phanourious to help him find the missing item. We continued to look with no avail. Finally I realized that I should take my own advice and I said a quick prayer. “St. Phanourious please pray to God to help us find the lost item because you are the revealer of lost things. Amen”

It was literally moments after I prayed that I found the lost item.

Vincent was filled with joy and my heart was lifted to heaven as I was reminded that morning that we were not alone. I have been given intercessors who are here to help me when my actions and words just aren’t enough.

I’ve been converted!

I am and forever will be one of those mothers who asks for help. Only the help I ask for, sometimes, is of the spiritual nature because I know that there will be days when I’m not enough and that’s ok.

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